Our Wedding Network's Bridezilla Avoidance Tactics
Wedding Planning is stressful Yo!
There are sooooooooo many things to consider:
Which date? Who is invited? How much do we spend? What about so and so? Plated or buffet? DJ or Band? Outside or inside? Photographer? Videographer? White Doves & Butterflies? Open Bar or Cash Bar? What to wear? Isn’t Aunty Daisy Banting?
All of a sudden, smiles turn to tears, laughter turn into screams, and the next thing you know you’ve turned green and are shouting “Bride Smash!!!” at the poor shop attendant who asked if you’d like a plastic bag for your groceries… There you have it… Bridezilla has emerged…
How can this state be avoided? After all wedding planning should be a fun time in one’s life, the only tears during this time should be happy tears.
Now, those of us who have gotten married all have the same advice to give, it is the advice that we heard from all our married friends and the same advice they heard from all of their married friends and so on and so on…. This brings us to Bridezilla Avoidance Tactic No.1:
It is Our Day!
So, looking back at those considerations we were making in the beginning of the post we start to notice a trend: A lot of everyone else and very little about the two people who matter the most... You and your husband to be. It is your day and not anyone else’s and your loved ones should respect this fact! So, if you'd like pink and blue dyed bunny rabbits as your ring bearers then so be it!
At the same time it is important that you also respect this fact. Your wedding may be your priority but that does not mean it should be everyone else’s. Yes, your loved ones are there to support you in your wedding planning journey, but let’s not forget they have lives to live as well. Accepting this fact will lead to less disappointment and ultimately fewer “Bride Smash!!” moments.
STOP!!! DEEP BREATH!!! RELAX!!!
Let’s compare the list of things to do to a pile of Autumn leaves. Every time you rake a few up, another few fall and add to the ever-growing pile, we rake those up and the pile gets bigger and so the process continues. Just when the lawn is clear one small unsuspecting task will flutter down, as it touches the ground… BOOM! You explode into Bridezilla and start breathing fire! Bridezilla Avoidance Tactic No.2: STOP!!! DEEP BREATH!!! RELAX!!!
Instead of using every waking moment for wedding planning, select a few days in a week to dedicate to your wedding and one or two days to do something non-wedding related. Plan a date night with your man or how about a bath, a book and a glass of wine?
Keep Your Eye on the Prize!
So, you didn’t get your favourite photographer, and your dress shopping isn’t going to plan. You’ve also just found out that Aunty Daisy found out you’ve decided on Potato Dauphinoise instead of Cauli Mash, and has informed your mother that she is most displeased… Bridezilla Avoidance Tactic No.3: Keep the eye on the prize!
Take a minute to reflect on the actual reason you are getting married. Its not for the perfect photos and the best food. You are marrying the person that you love. If at the end of the day this is achieved, you’ve nailed your wedding planning! Everything else is just a bonus!
The Pressure Cooker.
Pressure cookers are great! Which self-respecting foodie does not own or really, really wants to own one of these babies! But what happens if this beast of a cooking device doesn’t let off some steam every now and then… KABOOOOOOOOM! Bridal Avoidance Tactic No.4: The Pressure Cooker.
Brides will often keep a lot of their emotions to themselves, small things that annoy you. They keep these things to themselves for fear of being labelled a Bridezilla. Firstly you're allowd to get upset we are all human; internalising all your feelings can lead to you smashing things left right and centre. Try to have small venting sessions with your future hubby, girlfriends or your mom.
He Loves Me for Me!
The man you love has gotten down on one knee and said “Will you spend the rest of your life with me?” How does this translate in our heads to “Oh gosh! I’m getting Married… I have to lose 700kg to fit into my dress!”?
This amazing man, has decided that you are the one he would like to have a life with, in his eyes you are perfect, this brings us to Bridezilla Avoidance Tactic No. 5… He loves Me for Me!
Wedding Planning is stressful enough as it is and if you are aiming to keep Bridezilla at bay perhaps adding a pinch of Hangry isn'tthe best idea. No infact it's a recipe for disaster!
That being said, a well-balanced diet and a little exercise can do wonders in relieving the mounting stress. Take that wonderful human and go for a walk, chat, stay connected!
Keep Calm & Have Fun...
Planning a wedding is meant to be fun right? Um Yes!!!
It is sometimes easy to lose sight of this fact and with the stress piling on it starts to turn into a chore when this happens… Bridezilla Avoidance Tactic No.6: Keep Calm & Have Fun!
Actively remind yourself that this should be a happy enjoyable time in your life! Take the conscious decision to have fun!
Snow Flakes are Unique.
Is it possible to have two completely identical snowflakes? Some say yes, some tend to disagree. Now, I’m no expert, but when I think of all the varying conditions snowflakes encounter as they float from the heavens, I’d say no! You may find similarities, but each flake is beautiful and unique in its own right. The same goes for your wedding. Bridezilla Avoidance Tactic No.7: Snow Flakes are Unique.
Comparing your wedding to other weddings you’ve attended, or trying to make each aspect of your wedding unique is not only impractical but it can also lead to unnecessary stress. So, choosing not to do something just because Mr & Mrs Smith did it, is silly. You and your fiancé are not Mr & Mrs Smith you are unique individuals, as such, your spin on things may have some similarities but your wedding will be unique and beautiful in its own right.
Be a Duck!
If it swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, chances are it is a duck…
Your big day has arrived! Months of planning, thus far, you have avoided all “Bride-Smash!” moments like a boss! Be prepared, because today is the most stressful of them all. You did not get a wink of sleep with all the butterflies and excitement but it’s all good you’re getting married! Eeeeeek!
Suddenly... The phone rings, the DJ is running late, he drove his car through a puddle and is now stuck. What!? Does he not understand the concept of buffering time!? Bridezilla Avoidance Tactic No.8: Be a duck!
You can be the most organised person in the world, you cannot however control everything and everyone all the time. When things go wrong, have a sip of champagne and pass the phone to your Maid of Honour, or to the Best Man they’ve got your back! Water off a duck’s back!
The Bridezilla avoidance struggle is real. By employing these eight avoidance tactics, you can get through the rough times, making wedding planning one of the greatest times of your life!
Got a Bridezilla Avoidance Tactic of your own? Leave a comment below! 😊